Chapter 32

Chapter 32

Won't You Have a Drink with Me?

Clarice and I left the citadel dressed in ordinary clothes.

The outfit she'd prepared was plain enough for an ordinary citizen to wear.

She really had come prepared.

Even normal clothes couldn't completely hide our appearance, but they'd at least reduce the amount of attention we attracted.

Together with Clarice, I stepped out into Septimoa's lively streets.

The First Ward, containing the central citadel, and the Second Ward, packed with temples, had the solemn and sacred atmosphere you'd expect from the Holy Empire.

But once you reached the Third Ward, the largest district and where most people lived, the atmosphere changed completely.

If the Second Ward felt like a solemn, elegant historical district, the Third Ward felt like a noisy metropolis overflowing with actual life.

Tourists might consider the magnificent temples of the Second Ward worth seeing, but Clarice and I had spent practically our entire lives in temples.

There was no particular reason for us to wander around them.

More importantly, the Second Ward was filled with clergy and people connected to the Orders, so there were too many people who could recognize us.

That was why Clarice and I decided to have fun in the Third Ward, where we could walk around without being bothered.

“Where should we go?”

“Hmm. Why don't we go wherever you want, Clarice?”

“Then how about something sweet first? There's a place I visit whenever I come to the capital.”

“...I literally just ate breakfast.”

It hadn't even been thirty minutes since I'd finished eating.

I was still full.

“Dessert and meals are different.”

“Mmm... Are they?”

Back on Earth, there was a joke that women had a separate stomach for dessert.

Apparently that hadn't changed here.

You only had to look at the priestesses in our Order.

They'd stuff themselves during meals and then somehow still eat dessert as if they weren't full at all.

Maybe because only my body was female while I was still a man inside, I unfortunately had no such thing as a dessert stomach.

Which meant perhaps the so-called dessert stomach wasn't physical, but something engraved directly into the soul?

While pondering something so pointless, I followed Clarice into the café.

Most of the interior was made of wood, giving it a warm, cozy atmosphere.

Exactly the kind of café Clarice would like.

“Big Sis, what do you want to drink?”

“Espresso and ice water. No dessert for me.”

The menu had all sorts of things written on it, but those were the only two things I ever wanted.

Clarice tilted her head at my order.

“That's all? No dessert?”

“Yeah. I'm still a little full.”

“You ate that little and you're full? Anyway, go sit down and wait.”

Clarice stared at me like she couldn't possibly understand.

...Have I mentioned this before?

I have a small stomach.

If I eat even a little too much, I start feeling bloated and uncomfortable.

Of course, I could solve that by using divine power to force digestion.

And early on, I'd used that trick enthusiastically.

...But after doing it repeatedly, there were side effects.

Divine power kept doing the work my digestive system was supposed to handle, so my already pathetic digestion and tiny stomach degraded even further.

Now I ate little to begin with and had somehow become an involuntary light eater who could eat even less.

Eventually I figured that if I couldn't eat much anyway, I might as well properly savor what I did eat.

So nibbling slowly had become my eating habit.

I'll probably never hear anyone say I eat heartily in my entire life.

Still, if I looked at it positively, wasn't this an incredibly efficient body?

Being able to function on very little food was quite useful in harsh environments like the Demon Realm.

Thud-

“...?”

Clarice had threatened me to stay seated because I was a patient, so I was sitting idly on the sunny café terrace, enjoying the warmth.

Then a heavy sound made the table tremble, drawing my attention.

The first things I saw were the espresso and ice water I'd ordered.

And...

“...Isn't this too much? I'm still full. I can't eat much.”

Cake.

Muffins.

Madeleines.

Cookies.

Even a parfait.

All kinds of desserts covered the entire table.

“Don't worry. I can eat it all myself.”

I gave Clarice a look that clearly asked, You're seriously eating all of that?

She proudly puffed out her chest.

“What about lunch?”

“I'll eat lunch too.”

“?”

That's possible?

Well... I suppose it must be if she's saying it.

I shrugged it off, lifted the espresso cup, and poured it straight into the ice water.

“...Big Sis? What are you doing?”

“Hm?”

Clarice was staring at me in disbelief.

Her horrified eyes were fixed on the iced Americano I'd just created.

Ah.

Right.

You too have yet to understand the greatness of this black elixir of life.

“Clarice, why don't you try—”

“Why are you turning perfectly good coffee into dirty water?”

...That's cruel.

Dirty water?

This medieval Western world might as well have been modeled after Italy, considering how good the food was.

But the concept of an Americano simply didn't exist.

That was my one complaint.

Still, how difficult was it to make an Americano?

Pour espresso into ice water.

That's an iced Americano.

Right?

Everyone seeing an Americano for the first time reacted as though I'd shown them some grotesque demonic beast.

Clarice looked equally disgusted, but I ignored her and took a sip.

“People who don't understand the greatness of an Americano are pitiful.”

“You even named it...?”

“Yep.”

“Well... I suppose everyone has different tastes.”

Clarice sighed deeply, shook her head, and began cutting into her cake with a fork.

One day I'll spread the glory of the Americano across this world.

People in our Order had already started drinking them, so it wasn't even an impossible dream.

“Big Sis, open wide~”

After a brief silence, Clarice, who'd been busily working through the desserts, stabbed a piece of strawberry cake covered in whipped cream and brought it to my lips.

“I told you I don't really like sweets...”

I complained, but couldn't exactly reject her.

Pretending I had no choice, I opened my mouth and accepted the bite.

Unexpectedly mild sweetness spread gently across my tongue.

‘Hm? This is better than I expected.’

I'd always hated sweet things.

Maybe this place really was good at making desserts if Clarice liked it enough to recommend it.

But my admiration lasted only briefly.

After accepting several different desserts she kept feeding me, my stomach quickly began signaling that it had reached its limit.

Such is the suffering of a light eater.

“Ugh... I'm full...”

“Big Sis, are you sure you don't have some kind of problem? How can you eat as much as a bird and say you're full?”

“Probably not... I actually ate more than usual today.”

“Wow. How do you get enough energy to fight in the Demon Realm eating like that?”

And so I spent time with Clarice at the café.

Watching her happily chew through desserts made me understand what people meant when they said watching someone eat could make you feel full too.

Her cheeks puffed up like a squirrel's, and I desperately wanted to poke them once.

But I'd probably suffer consequences afterward, so I restrained myself.

After chatting about random nonsense at the café for a while, we returned to the streets.

Our first destination was the market.

“Big Sis, look at those! Aren't they adorable?”

Where Clarice pointed were piles of plump stuffed bears and keychains shaped like various animals.

“What do you think? Cute, right?”

“...They are cute.”

They really were adorable teddy bears.

Of course, being cute was literally their only function.

Still, dolls were made to be cute in the first place, so I suppose they were fulfilling their purpose perfectly well.

“This one suits you perfectly, Big Sis.”

Clarice rummaged through the stall and held out a cute white rabbit keychain.

“Wouldn't it look adorable hanging from the holy spear Astra?”

“Hmm...”

She wanted me to hang something this cute from a weapon?

Wasn't that a little too niche?

After a single trip into the Demon Realm, that adorable white rabbit would be soaked in demonic beast blood and transformed into a crimson Vorpal Rabbit.

Still, Clarice was holding it out with sparkling eyes, so I couldn't reject the gesture.

I accepted it.

I'll hang it from some bag I carry around instead of Astra.

The next place we visited was a jewelry shop.

Nothing there was especially luxurious or extravagant, but it was filled with small, cute accessories.

Unlike me, who merely glanced around while thinking about other things, Clarice examined everything carefully before picking up a small brooch.

“I think this would suit you, Big Sis... Want to get matching ones with me?”

“If that's what you want.”

So we bought matching brooches for a reasonable price, then moved on to a clothing store.

Probably because it was located in the Third Ward, where ordinary citizens were the majority, most of the clothes looked practical and easy to move in.

Clarice looked around, picked out an outfit, and held it up against me.

“Big Sis, want to try this on? It'd look good on you.”

The top was an off-the-shoulder blouse exposing a bold amount of shoulder.

The bottom was a pleated skirt—the kind people back on Earth would call a tennis skirt.

You want me to wear something this embarrassing?

“I'd rather not wear a skirt. And isn't that way too revealing?”

Clarice's eyes sparkled with mischief at my answer.

Ah.

Wait.

I think I know what she's about to say.

“...Right. You prefer bold outfits like your Sacred Vestments, don't you?”

“No!”

Goddammit.

Thanks to the Sacred Vestments, I can't say a single thing about revealing clothes without getting this thrown back at me.

One day I'll break Goddess Eris's stubbornness and change the design of those Sacred Vestments.

Preferably into some badass armor.

“Ah! Big Sis, look over there! Let's go there too!”

...And after following Clarice around for quite some time, I finally realized just how exhausting shopping could be.

Novels sometimes described men getting worn out while following women around on shopping trips.

Now I understood them.

Still, it counted as light exercise and helped settle my stomach.

And seeing Clarice look that happy was nice.

Besides, wandering through the streets, browsing different shops, and buying things I liked was surprisingly enjoyable.

After exploring the market for a long time, we finally left with our hands full of bags.

We'd been so absorbed that it was already around four in the afternoon.

“We ended up staying out a little late. Should we eat before going back to the citadel?”

“Sure.”

“Whew, walking around so much made me hungry. Aren't you hungry, Big Sis?”

“I'm neither hungry nor not hungry.”

“What kind of vague answer is that?”

Clarice snickered.

It wasn't vague.

That really was how I felt.

I wasn't hungry, but my stomach wasn't bloated either.

Exactly the right middle ground.

“There's a pretty good restaurant in the Second Ward. The priests from our Order recommended it. Want to go?”

“Sure. We can eat there on the way back.”

In the Second Ward, we wouldn't even have to worry about security.

We headed straight toward the restaurant Clarice recommended.

When we arrived, an employee was standing outside the entrance.

His expression and behavior looked extremely strange.

How should I describe it...

Right.

He had the exact expression of a dog desperately holding in a shit.

“Customers, I'm sorry, but we're closed today— Huh!? Saintesses?”

The employee's eyes widened when he saw us.

Yep.

People recognized us immediately in the Second Ward.

Good thing we'd spent the day in the Third.

“Is today your day off? That's unfortunate. We'll find somewhere else—”

“No, it's fine! If it's the Saintesses, you may enter!”

“...Huh? Then... we'll go in.”

Were some high-ranking officials eating inside?

Or had someone rented out the whole restaurant for a private gathering?

With that question in mind, I pushed open the door.

“Ugh... Booze.”

The instant the door opened, an overwhelming smell of alcohol slammed into me hard enough to make my head spin.

Did someone pour out an entire barrel?

Why the hell does it smell this strong?

Looking around, I spotted several employees collapsed on the floor.

“What the...? Clarice, behind me.”

Something was clearly wrong.

I immediately moved Clarice behind my back and summoned Astra into my hand.

Perhaps because they hadn't planned to open today, the restaurant was dark inside with most of the lights extinguished.

Did someone come in here and start a rampage?

Who had the guts to cause trouble in a place like this?

As I searched the darkness, I noticed what looked like an enormous doll seated at a table in the distance.

It was difficult to see through the darkness.

But the instant I recognized what it was, I had to swallow a curse.

...Doesn't seem like she's noticed us yet.

Let's get out before she does.

“...Big Sis? Judging by the atmosphere, did something happen—”

“Shh.”

I raised a finger to my lips and cut Clarice off.

Then I dismissed Astra as naturally as possible.

“Quietly. Let's back out of here. Don't say anything. Just listen to me.”

“But the employees are collapsed...”

“They're just drunk and passed out. Let's go.”

Clarice nodded uncertainly.

Just as the two of us quietly began backing toward the door...

BAM-

Someone slammed the half-open door shut.

The culprit was the owner of the enormous shadow looming over us.

“...Ah, fuck.”

I finally failed to hold back the curse.

I had to crane my neck almost painfully far upward.

A gigantic woman radiating overwhelming presence stood over us, one hand pressed against the door and a bottle of alcohol in the other.

She stood well over two meters tall.

Short hair as black as ebony.

Two horns protruding from between the strands.

Golden eyes shining brilliantly.

A woman of the dokkaebi race.

“Heeeh~ Hic. Long time no seeee, Sisters Clarice and Beatriceee.”

The huge woman spoke with a drunkenly slurred voice, breathing alcohol all over us.

She was...

“To think meeting you here by pure chaaance is all~ a bond arranged by Lord Dianaaa, wouldn't you agreee? So why don't you have a drink with meee?”

Kiara.

Saintess of the Order serving Diana, God of Gold and Alcohol, one of the Seven Great Holy Orders.

“I offered these employee friendsss a few drinksss, but they couldn't even handle that much and collapsed so shamefullyyy. Surely you two can drink with meee?”

A drunken Saintess who spent twenty-four hours a day, 365 days a year, with alcohol permanently attached to her lips.